Issue date: 9/3/08 Section: Features

Media Credit: Courtesy Photo Nick Trujillo and Leah Vande Berg on their wedding day. Vande Berg died of ovarian cancer on Dec. 13, 2004. [Click to enlarge]

Click here to hear more of Trujillo's thoughts.

Nick Trujillo a communications studies professor at Sacramento State never thought he would have to bathe and feed his wife of 19 and a half years. That all changed on October 19, 2003 when his wife, Leah Vande Berg, a fellow communication studies professor was diagnosed with ovarian cancer.

Trujillo said his wife was going to see the doctor for what she thought was a mere bladder infection. On December 13, 2004 Trujillo's wife died from ovarian cancer. Four days later she was cremated, her remains scattered in 10 different locations including the alumni grove at Sac State. He said over 300 people attended her funeral including fellow teachers and students.

Being a communication studies professor Trujillo, 52, decided that during his wife's struggle through cancer treatment he needed an outlet to deal with his emotions and fears.

His outlet became a book entitled "Cancer and Death; A Love Story." The book chronicles his and his wife's experiences from her diagnosis to her death. Trujillo said he wanted to teach people about cancer by writing this book from both his and his wife's perspectives.

"I wanted to let people know how to live with a terminal illness and die with dignity," Trujillo said.

While he wrote, his wife projected her story through 15, 90-minute audio tapes, which Trujillo then listened to and transcribed. Trujillo said that his writing became a means of therapy for him, allowing himself to express what he was feeling inside. Feelings like he and his wife's fear of her being no longer able to walk. He said Vande Berg was afraid of falling.

"The most painful thing was watching her loose control over her whole body," he said. "She was a control freak, so it was really hard for her."

Trujillo said the main thing he wanted people to know was that ovarian cancer, while terrible, is not something you have to go through alone.

"Our culture tends to not talk about death or grief," he said. "(The book talks about) what people go through, how horrible this disease is and that you can do it,"

His book has touched the lives of many including Kimo AhYun, a colleague and friend of Trujillo and Vande Berg.

AhYun, an assistant communication studies professor is mentioned in Trujillo's book. AhYun said that, in his opinion, the book depicts the importance of personal connections.

"It gives you a greater appreciation for the relationship you have with people, especially Leah, and the role she had with her family," AhYun said. "You aren't sure what is going to happen in life."

AhYun said the book not only helped Trujillo get through the passing of his wife, but gave him an understanding on how to deal with incidents such as these.

"There are a lot of resources out there that explain how to deal, but I think this book gives the license to say there are many ways to cope with (cancer)," he said.

Ah Yun described Vande Berg as "passionate, determined and wickedly intelligent."

Kirsten Vann, a Sac State graduate, said the book was detailed and honest. Having had both of her grandparents die of cancer, she said she could connect with the book.

"When you see it from anther's perspective it is definitely brutally honest," Vann said. "I experienced it and anyone who feels for others experiences will know that it is very honest."

Although Vande Berg passed away in December of 2004 that is not when Trujillo completed his book.

He said he wanted to end the book when he was actually ready to do so. So he waited to be in a state of happiness to show readers that life goes on. Trujillo waited a whole year to write the last chapter. The book was finally published on July of this year through Hampton Press. Trujillo said that his book sales are "doing well" and part of the funds from the book are donated to the National Ovarian Cancer Foundation Coalition. "Cancer and Death; A Love Story" can be purchased through HamptonPress.com. There is also a scholarship program for Graduate Communication Studies students in Vande Berg's name.

"This (book) is perfect for a widow or widower to show that there is light at the end of the tunnel," Trujillo said. "I survived this...I am stronger and I feel like I can do anything."

Vanessa Johnson can be reached at vjohnson@statehornet.com

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